Subsistentialism

Bail Out

2010-11-16T10:07:00.000-08:00

Where is my check.

Privacy

2007-06-01T12:03:00.000-07:00

If this woman did not like having a picture of her cat in Google maps, what will she do when she finds out there's a picture of her cat in the New York Times

Running in the Morning or Running at Night

2006-08-25T02:36:00.000-07:00

I try to run every morning, wherever I am. I'm a much nicer person when I do. Ask anyone. And I generally run in Central Park, either the 6 or 4 mile loop or if it's hot or I'm just lazy, I take a quick 1.58 mile loop of the reservoir. I used to (10 plus years ago) run at night and occasionally now, for whatever reason I still do. Here are the differences between the two.

There are many more people, especially in the summer at night (especially around 7 PM).

The people at night tend to be younger, faster, and better looking than the people in the morning. And unless you have the maturity to run your own pace (which I do not), you tend to get a much better workout at night. More than that, a lot of them also seem interested in racing, which is fine. But if you're going to pass me, you're going to fucking earn it.

There seems to be much more dog shit in the park at night. And on a humid night like tonight, the park just reeks of it. Thanks, dog owners.

The sidewalks and streets going to and from the park are more crowded and the people on them don't seem to like runners. A boy (perhaps 12 years old) purposely hit me with his bike last week, forcing me to gently straight arm the little shit and gracefully vault a tree box. A junkie executed a perfect 180 degree turn in front of me last night, then veered the 30 degrees back to get in front of me as I tried to avoid her (netting 150 degrees) and screamed "if you hit me I'll hit you back" as I stutter-stepped to her right (my left). And the fucking livery cabs must get a bonus for hitting runners.

There are more rats and raccoons in the park at night. Hower, both coyotes (and I only actually witnessed the first hunt) were in the morning.

Recycling News or Something Like News, Anyway

2005-10-13T06:28:00.000-07:00

Verizon (one of the largest telecommunications companies in the world) and Associated Press (one of the big names in news gathering) delivered an article to my desktop about a new "chastity" club at Princeton University in an article called, somewhat obviously, New Club Promotes Chastity at Princeton. The time stamp on the article is October 13, 2005, at 3:24:24 EST, but the dateline carries no date and the year the article was written in is not mentioned. However, it does not have to be read very closely to determine that the "New" in the headline is not entirely accurate. Rebecca Santana, the author, writes that the club was formed "about a year ago." Santana also mentions that the club was mentioned in "article in the university newspaper last February."

So even if it is interesting, it is not new. The mighty AP has been scooped by a student paper. And Verizon's contribution? The photo, credited to Tim Larsen/AP Photo, does not load. And the link to the club on the Princeton University website does not work.

Stock Market Games

2005-09-23T00:20:00.000-07:00

A long time a go, I wrote a celebrity stock market game. Now I see someone has written a blog stock market game. I wonder what it means. Here's a link ro the site.

Applying for a Job

2005-04-24T08:36:00.000-07:00

I was up early this morning checking out the jobs on Craigslist because I've been writing a business plan for my new company AMExT LLC and I'm burnt out and broke and I could really use a short term gig. The Columbia University School of Continuing Education was looking for an Assistant Director of Web Communications which, although posted in the internet engineering jobs, is essentially an assistant nincompoop to another nincompoop who manages a Cold Fusion web site. Well, since they were prepared to pay $50,000 for this gig and it's in my neighborhood and I could do it drunk or in my sleep, I clicked over to the Columbia Human Resources site (with Clint Eastwood's Dirty Harry reverberating in me brain, "Personnel? That's for assholes") and applied. I filled out their stupid little forms honestly and diligently. ("Have you ever been convicted of a crime?" was a pretty irrelevant question and, coming from that bastion of politcal correctness and moral cowardice, unintentionally funny. Oh, and for the record, "Yes.") I knew that the fact I had never managed a Cold Fusion web site might be an issue, but since using Cold Fusion is as easy and as mindless as using a Speak and Spell, I dutifully acknowleged my lack of experience. Hell, I wrote a content management program. Surely, Columbia University wouldn't hold a lack of Cold Fusion experience against me. That would be like holding membership in the Hitler Youth against a leader of a major religion.

Well, after I filled out the form, I checked my application status and saw that I did not meet the minimum requirements for the job. The HR system itself, without human intervention, took measure of me and found me lacking.

I was able to get over it. Barely.

The Gates

2005-03-06T05:49:00.000-08:00

I've been running through the Christo Gates project for weeks now. The set up and take down were much more interesting than the project itself. But what struck me, start to finish (and it's not quite finished yet), was how utterly pointless it was. That said, I'm glad they did it and I'll miss it.

Haiku

2005-02-09T08:28:00.000-08:00

There was a snowstorm in New York a couple of weeks ago that left Central Park looking more like a postcard than it usually does. And because I run in Central Park almost every day, I was inspired to write a poem:

A frosty morning
Steaming shit pile in the snow
Thank the dog walker

The Bible for Illiterates

2004-09-17T06:50:00.000-07:00

At a wake last night, a very pleasant priest (and I tend to despise all proponents of any organized religion,) described the rosary as "the bible for illiterates." He explained that in the middle ages, people were given these short repetitious prayers and a set of mnemonic beads so that they could recite the lessons of the bible despite the fact that they could not read. The priest also had a nifty little ring rosary so that he could pray while he drove despite the fact that he was probably literate.

I thought at the time that it was a cute story. And I still think that he was probably not a bad person. But, having a bible for illiterates is wrong. It is one more way of exploiting people rather than helping them. It's the same thing as saying that TV is culture for illiterates. Yes, it gives comfort to many people, but it's real purpose is to sell shit to people that they don't need or want. Just like religion.

The Definition of Subsistentialism

2004-08-13T08:10:00.000-07:00

Basically, subsistentialism (as I see it and, frankly, I don't care how anyone else sees it) is the essentially the philosophy of plants, leaves growing toward the sun (phototropism) and roots growing toward the earth (geotropism) as practiced by humans. Depressed, yet?